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Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Jun 11, 2019

Episode Summary:


Let’s face it, parenting teens can be a trying time. We all want to know how to parent teenagers effectively. If you are a parent of teens, or even of young children who will become teens, and want to effectively guide them rather than managing them, today is the perfect show for you. In this episode, we will be talking with Connie Albers, author of “Parenting Beyond the Rules: Raising Teens with Confidence & Joy.”


Today we are going to be talking about the high calling of parenting. After 30 years of parenting five children and 20 years of working with teens, Connie has witnessed the negative impact of well-intentioned but misguided parenting styles, all focused on managing teens rather than guiding them. Connie prefers to raise a teen according to his or her strengths, talents, and personality type in a way that will equip the teen to manage life. In this episode, Connie shares with us how to parent teenagers with confidence and joy.


Connie believes that the teen years are not something to dread. This critical season of our children learning to become adults can be filled with joy and rich relationship by parenting beyond the rules.


Quotables from the episode:


  • If you’ve ever wondered how to parent teenagers with confidence and joy, you’ll want to listen to this episode of Your Hope Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson.
  • We should strive to guide our teens, rather than manage them.
  • The home is one of the best and hardest places to make disciples.
  • Connie suggests raising teens according to their strengths, talents, and personality types in a way that will equip our teens to manage life.
  • Kids still need our guidance, even if they don’t think they do.
  • So often, parents don’t want to parent—they want to be their child’s friend. If you will parent now, you can be your child’s friend later, but if you are your child’s friend now, they will grow to resent you.
  • Start by getting to know your teen’s world. It is much different than the world the parents grew up in.
  • Come alongside your child and help them find an area they are passionate about.
  • If we don’t let our teens stumble and fall when they are within the safe confines of our home, they will stumble and fall after they’ve left the nest and they won’t know how to manage it.
  • Parents are so naturally good at enforcing rules. But sometimes we have to parent beyond the rules.
  • As your child grows and matures, you can begin adjusting the rules.
  • Pray, step back and start listening more to your child, start monitoring your mouth, and ask the Lord to help you discern what your child is trying to communicate to you.
  • Trust the Lord to give you the wisdom and insight you need to either back off or to approach that child in a different way.
  • It’s always too soon to give up. It is never too late!


Scripture References:


  • Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” (Ephesians 6:4)
  • “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:34)
  • Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6).


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Air Date: May 27, 2019


Guest: Connie Albers, author and popular speaker.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson

Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson