Aug 29, 2024
Episode Summary:
In this episode, I talked with former runway model, Jennifer
Strickland. Jennifer shared how she suffered emotional and
spiritual wounds when she allowed others’ opinions of her to
determine her worth and value. Through her journey, she discovered
the importance of finding the true source of her worth -- in
Christ. Now, she ministers to other women who need to know this
life-changing truth as well.
Quotables from the episode:
- We all have pain and hurt, and if we aren’t careful and don’t
get healing, that is what the enemy uses to hold us back, to think
that we are not worthy to be used by God, that we are not worthy of
love and acceptance.
- Sometimes, those things are things that have happened to us.
Other times, they are things that we have made a conscious decision
to participate in.
- But I’m here to tell you that your past is not wasted. And that
thing that you think is so shameful, embarrassing, or disgraceful
is often exactly what God wants to use to encourage others and to
help you grow.
- I was 22 years old when I lived in Milan and was modeling on
the runway. A particular man came into my life as a father figure
and he saw that I could be a top model. That began a long journey
in my life of believing that I was what man said about me.
- The lens that agents and photographers saw me became the lens
through which I saw myself. If they said I was beautiful, I
believed it, but if they said that I was ugly or anorexic then I
believed that.
- This particular relationship became toxic for me spiritually. I
really believe that the enemy worked through this man to plant some
really poisonous lies in my heart.
- When I didn’t make the choices that he wanted me to make, he
told me I was disposable, so I allowed man to determine my
value.
- On the spiritual side of things, when I discovered Jesus, it
drove me into a deep study of who was man? The word of God says,
“do not put your trust in princes, in human beings, who cannot
save…but if you put your trust in God it will be like a
well-watered garden.”
- It was the destructive lies that I heard from my interaction
with this man that led me to write many of the messages I write now
which helps women understand what’s going on with them when they
allow a good man or a bad man to give them their identity, value,
or worth.
- I carried the lies I believed about man determining my identity
even into my marriage even after I became a Christian. So, if my
husband said anything, even if he was trying to help me, I became
very defensive and fearful based on what he said. I had to heal
from those lies.
- I had to wallpaper my mind with truth. I had to forgive. It was
very difficult for me to forgive a couple of particular people in
the modeling industry for how they impacted my life, but when I
did, I could then filter what other people were saying to me
through a lens of wholeness.
- I had to do that healing work first before I could receive from
Godly men, like my husband or father figures in a healthy way. I
could receive constructive criticism or correction without
believing it had anything to do with my identity.
- The enemy often plants lies in our childhood before we are
mature enough to identify them as lies. The longer and more
frequently we hear them, the more they become imbedded. It takes a
lot of time and willingness to go deep and ask, “what lies have I
believed?”
- Healing is a process and if we will take those wounds to God,
he can take them, heal them, and turn them into beautiful sacred
scars.
- The key to healing is always honesty.
- For me, healing began with writing my story, speaking my story,
and identifying the patterns that were going on.
- I also believed that I was only as valuable as what I saw in
the mirror or what I saw in other girls. That continued into my
ministry as social media was throwing other people in my face,
whereas when ministry was one on one with me and another girl, I
never thought about that or played the comparison game.
- I had to learn to celebrate other women and continue running in
my own lane and do it well.
- It’s a matter of dealing with the memories, assessing the lies
and replacing them with the truth of what God says about us.
- I am his ambassador, I am his daughter, I am the apple of his
eye. He never takes his eye off of me. I am loved by him every
single day. His grace is sufficient for me.
- We have to stand on his truth and then walk in it. Confession
and repentance is so important. The power of being honest about our
sin is unmatched.
- Once we get honest about our struggle, is the first step, and
then replacing it with truth of who we are.
- Culture today talks about “my truth” but that is just more
deception from the enemy because there is only one truth and it is
God’s truth based on what he has already spelled out and told us in
his Word.
- You are already loved, accepted, and adored by the God of the
universe!
- Scripture says that the heart is deceitful above all else, and
we rely on “our truth” that is deception.
- What I admire about your ministry is that you are taking a very
painful wound from your teen and young adult years, and using it to
minister to other women, as a beautiful sacred scar because you can
say, “I’ve been through this. I know the lies you’re believing. But
let me share with you what I’ve learned on my journey.”
- God showed me my scars served a redemptive purpose by allowing
me to get to the bottom of the well where things were so dark and
so destructive for me. I was suicidal, I was using drugs and
alcohol. I was starving myself. I hated myself. God allowed me to
get to a place of total darkness.
- At that point, when I began reading God’s Word for the first
time, and Christians invited me to church, I began to see that the
lies the world tells us about beauty, worth, purpose, “my truth”
means nothing. It’s such a shallow wide ocean that you drown in
real quick.
- But his love is endlessly deep. You can dip your toe into the
word of God the rest of your life and stay endlessly
refreshed.
- It’s a lifelong walk of saying society is not going to define
me, media is not going to define me, but God is going to be the one
to define me and fill me up.
- We need to turn every day to the Lord and say, “I need you to
fill me up. I need your wisdom today. I’m not going to find it in
me.
- If something devastating has happened to you, or if you’ve made
poor choices, you are not too far gone for the God of the universe
to reach down into that pit and say, “Let me show you a different
way and let me not only bring you out of it but redeem it for good
and for my glory.”
- When it seems impossible, remember God is the God of the
impossible so let him do the seemingly impossible in your
life.
- The hope filled perspective is that God will shine his light
into the depths of your dark sea, but you have to choose to swim
after it. God sold everything he had for you, and that was his son,
Jesus. Jesus is the light of the world. So, when he wants to shine
that light on the beautiful person you are, but you have to be
honest and let him wash you with his spirit to be able to reveal
who you are really intended to be.
- When you’re in that very painful place, that sand of adversity,
let it shape you more into his likeness.
Scripture References:
- Psalms 25:20 NIV “Guard my life and rescue me;
do not let me be put to shame, for I take refuge in you.”
- Psalms 146:3 NIV “Do not put your trust
in princes, in human beings, who cannot save.”
- Jeremiah 17:9 NIV “The heart is deceitful
above all things and beyond cure.”
Recommended Resources:
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Guest:
Jennifer Strickland is a former international model, TEDx
speaker, author, wife, mother of three, and the founder of a
non-profit called U R More, that helps women and girls discover
their value, identity, and purpose.
Jen has written several books and studies teaching women and
girls their true worth, including Girl Perfect, More Beautiful Than
You Know, Beautiful Lies, and 21 Myths (Even Good) Girls Believe
About Sex. She holds a bachelor’s degree in broadcast journalism
and a master’s degree in writing with an emphasis in biblical
studies.
In her earlier days, Jen worked for 15 years as a professional
model, appearing in Vogue, Glamour, and Cosmopolitan. She was
featured in ads for Converse Tennis Shoes, Oil of O’lay, Mercedes
Benz, Eddie Bauer, and Jordache; and at the height of her career,
she walked the runways of Europe for Giorgio Armani and represented
Barbie for the 35th anniversary of the doll. But Jen learned beauty
is more than what meets the eye when she discovered what she looked
like in God’s eyes.
Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson
Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson